The Pop Corporation

Without a note being played, ‘Man’s Best Friend’ had annoyed half the internet thanks to the cover artwork. We’re not here for that, because in Sabrina Carpenter, we’ve got a popstar that’s remember that glittery, camp fun is a thing to rejoice.

That’s not to say Carpenter lacks substance, but rather, reading too much into what she does feels redundant and an exercise in nitpicking. Besides, is anyone willing to have a word with themselves about simultaneously infantilising someone because they’re petite, at the same time as sexualising them?

That’s not Sabrina’s fault – she’s just making fun pop music with bounce and pithy asides.

Oddly, the rise of Sabrina Carpenter seems to coincide with the crash-and-burn of Katy Perry’s career – that might be something to do with Sabrina’s brand of pin-up camp filling the void that Perry left behind when she felt like she stopped being self-aware.

Whichever way you look at it, ‘Espresso’ was an all-conquering pop song that was daft, fun, and sung by someone who didn’t seem to tire of it. A consummate professional, but not a boring one. There’s something about Carpenter that appeals to the hipster pop fan too – if ‘Espresso’ was her Carly Rae ‘Call Me Maybe’, then like Jepsen, she proved she wasn’t a flash in the pan by having the nerve to have more hits, especially in ‘Please, Please, Please’.

Now, she’s got new songs for the setlist, and there’s loads to get stuck into. Leaping out from the off is the irresistible disco-pop of ‘Tears’, which feels wholesome enough until you realise you’re singing along to “I get wet at the thought of you” shortly followed by “tears run down my thighs”.

Crikey.

Of course, she’s already had a hit with lead single ‘Manchild’, which showed that this wasn’t going to be an album that surprised the hell out of us. The twists and turns are still within the pop remit, rather than forcibly making us rethink what she is as an artist.

No-one wanted that – we wanted some fluffy pop and good smutty choruses.

That said, there’s the slightest echo of Pepperland Beatles on ‘We Almost Broke Up Again Last Night’. It’s got a bubblegum McCartney stomp to it, kicking off with “bullshit repeats itself”, proving that pearl clutching parents surprised at the sexy dancing at shows really haven’t been listening to the albums closely enough.

“When Did You Get So Hot?” has a wedge platform of a breakbeat in it that is a soft nod to the likes of TLC, telling a tale that you already know simply by reading the song title. It’s not deep – it’s not meant to be, so stop over-thinking it and take a big swig from the glitter pot while you’re at it.

What’s so refreshing is that it doesn’t require you to know her lore to roll around in the music. While there’s some probable personal drama in the lyrics, it certainly never gets too melodramatic. It’s relatable. It’s not myth-making or any of that nonsense. It’s pop in its purest form, which feels relatively rare in the current climate. Pop tends to be rather streetwise and using dance music, or R&B, in a bid to feel cutting edge – which is great when done well obviously – but this is straight up-and-down pop with a capital P.

2024’s ‘Short n’ Sweet’ was Sabrina’s breakthrough, and ‘Man’s Best Friend’ is a perfect successor to that. It’s confessional while being wry, it’s witty and humorous, and at times it’s blunt as a shovel. It’ll build on the momentum she’s had this past year, and anyone who is still whining about the album cover is effectively not invited to the party – you feel Carpenter has enough fans by now, that some buzzkills online aren’t going to make a whole lot of difference, now that pop-cancel culture is withering on the vine.

She’s already made a joke at their expense with an alternative sleeve which has been “approved by God.”

It’s time to let our hair down, and Sabrina seems like the perfect popstar which will allow us to do exactly that. Get some innuendo in your life and a sly wink. It won’t change your life, but will sound great while you’re drinking pints of rosé from a plastic cup. Sabrina’s frilly knickers are getting back in the saddle and is tired of shit men – what a lovely marriage for a pop album in 2025, right?